While sitting in the waiting room this morning, I was surrounded by three pregnant women. They looked great. They looked very close to delivery. They looked like something that I will never be again. I'll be honest, a slight sadness set in because I'll never be pregnant again. Don't get me wrong, we never intended to have more kids seeing as my husband got "fixed" a few years ago, but this was the final nail in the coffin. Done. Finished. No more kids. It just took that moment for things to settle in and become more real. I'm good now.
Before entering the exam room, I had a very small ... super tiny ... ok, medium sized ... hope that my doctor would release me to do some normal activity; however, when the nurse walked me in the room and said "since this is your two week check up, you won't have to undress," I knew my chances were slim. Don't they know I'm Superwoman?!
If this surgery has done anything for me (besides saving my life), it's taught me that it's ok to take off my Superwoman cape. It's ok to let others take care of me. It's ok to rest. I'm NOT good at resting and I'm not good at asking for help. Thankfully, I haven't had to ask for help very often because the help has shown up at just the right time, every time that I've needed it. I have an awesome army of friends and family checking on me daily, bringing us dinner, taking my kids so I can nap, having my house cleaned, running to the store, bringing me sweet treats, etc. I'm blessed. I'm VERY blessed!
And, a huge thanks to my husband. He's been MAKING me rest, while he has taken over a lot of the day to day activities at home, after working all day. He's pretty awesome! Again, I'm VERY blessed!
So, as I rest, I'll be thinking about my next check up in two weeks. I'll be longing for the words, "you're released!" Mainly because I want to pick up my kids. Sure, I can hug them on ground level, but it's just not the same. I want to hold them. I also want to run, go to boot camp, play soccer, go to the grocery store, etc, but those are secondary to holding my sweet girls. After all, my family is the reason I went through this surgery in the first place.
Isaiah 58:8 - "Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear..."
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